6 Stereotypes We Hate
We took a break to make some changes, but what never changes around here is our hate sons! On our first show back, episode 49, we talked about Chappelle’s return to the public eye on Saturday Night Live. We can’t hate on Chappelle cause he’s awesome, so we going to hate on some stereotypes he brought to our attention and some others that he didn’t.
Fried Chicken and Watermelon
This is the dumbest shit I’ve ever heard of. You know what? Fuck it! Let’s just get rid of all the food stereotypes from around the world and ban them forever and see what’s left. Rice, you’re out. Watermelon, see you later. Spices, sorry my Indian friends but those are gone too. Kimchi, peace out homie. Pasta, shove it up your ass cause that’s out also. So what the fuck is left? Boiled chicken and milk? Can we just cut this shit out and enjoy some god damn fried chicken and watermelon!
True story: I once had a 60 year old man who saw me at the park walking my dogs ask me if I had a large penis and how it compared to a white man’s penis, like we all go around touching tips and comparing shafts. I told him the truth that black guys’ dicks are the most enormous things known to mankind. He was pleased that I had confirmed his suspicion and carried on with his day. Look man just be content with your little man or this could happen to you when you start trying to enlarge shit.
Everyone gets this twisted and I blame it on the movie White Men Can’t Jump, which should have been titled Messy Snipes Sucks At Basketball. Don’t think for a second that we don’t know what’s really going on here fellas. We can decipher the code…Let’s play a little game, I will write some words commonly used to describe athletes and you tell me the race of that athlete. Scrappy….Athletic…Gritty….Gifted…Heart…God Given Ability….If you guessed white, black, white, black, white, black, then you can decipher the code as well my friends. Listen man if you are a professional athlete then by definition you’re fucking athletic.
Don’t put me in a box you asshole! Music was around before hip-hop, so what did black people listen to back then? Don’t ask me if I can rap, you wouldn’t want me to ask you if you can serial kill. Obviously not the same but just imagine if every time you ran into someone of another race they asked you if you know how to serial kill. Haha what a hot line! Use that if you like.
I see my boy with a full beard and a Keffiyeh (head scarf) in line ahead of me and my first thought is, “Sweet, he is going to get the “random” check so I won’t have to.” That’s so fucked up because he’s looking back at me thinking, “Shit I should’ve let him go first.”
Look man let me destroy this stereotype now and make you guys understand what’s going on. Every race CAN dance, but not necessarily to the music from a different culture! You throw on some Prince, Michael or Wu Tang and I’ll rip up a dance floor. But if you drop some Nirvana…fish out of water son and I look like I can’t dance. Next time you see an Indian dude out of rhythm dancing to Taylor Swift, don’t hate on my man just realize the simple fact; that’s not his shit and if I dropped you in a Bollywood movie you would look wack too. Check these guys out…hot son!